A letter stained with blood

A version of me has died, so that another can take his place.

The “MITIN” you once knew has lost his once remembered face.

The circumstances I faced have taught me to adapt,

I now know what to do to survive, never thinking what is apt.

The realities that you know have blurred for me,

All of this now seems like a game to me.

Roll the dice, pick a number and make your move,

There seems to be no logic in this way of life.

You, me, we all are pieces in a game,

In the end we all are to be put back in the box,

For someone to start anew.

It doesn’t matter if you win or lose,

All the pieces are put back in the same box.

I still hold on to your hair clip,

To remember that I once held a bond with someone like you.

You may think of me as being so naïve,

But girls as a topic to me are very complicated and alien.

The space between us grows daily second by second,

It takes space by the things that I hesitate to share with you daily as they may seem trivial.

So seem to adapt so well in yet another hostile place.

I figure this now comes natural to you now.

I can’t imagine the way you’ve taught yourself to cope with a new environment every time.

I have had enough already.

I yearn for a hug, a pat on the back, someone to scuffle through my hair just once.

Filling me life with pointless alcohol now seems useless.

I crave for a dose of real fulfillment from someone.

No matter how much tough I may seem,

In the end at heart I’m still thirteen.

Do not think of this as yet another of my love letters,

I’ve grown over you.

I just had to pen down my thoughts and realized that only there is a possibility that you might get what I had to say.

Please don’t feel bad if you don’t get me as I’m a real hard nut to figure out even for myself, so don’t expect much from you.

Still appreciate you reading me rambling so far……